I Am the ‘Boys Have a Penis’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: A Candid Conversation.

The Austrian Oak is universally recognized as an Hollywood heavyweight. But, at the height of his blockbuster fame in the 1980s and 1990s, he also starred in several critically acclaimed comedies. The standout film is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35th anniversary this December.

The Film and That Line

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a undercover cop who goes undercover as a kindergarten teacher to locate a fugitive. Throughout the film's runtime, the investigation plot serves as a simple backdrop for the star to film humorous scenes with children. Arguably the most famous involves a little boy named Joseph, who unprompted announces and declares the stoic star, “Males have a penis, girls have a vagina.” The Terminator responds dryly, “Thanks for the tip.”

The boy behind the line was brought to life by former young actor Miko Hughes. In addition to this part encompassed a notable part on Full House playing the antagonist to the child stars and the haunting part of the child who returns in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with several projects listed on his IMDb. Furthermore, he engages with fans at the con circuit. He recently discussed his experiences from the production over three decades on.

Memories from the Set

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I believe I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's impressive, I have no memory from being four. Do you remember anything from that time?

Yeah, somewhat. They're snapshots. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would accompany me to auditions. Frequently it was like a cattle call. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all simply wait around, enter the casting office, be in there for a very short time, do whatever little line they wanted and that's all. My parents would feed me the lines and then, when I became literate, that was the initial content I was reading.

Do you have an impression of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was extremely gentle. He was fun. He was pleasant, which arguably stands to reason. It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom, that probably wouldn't make for a good work environment. He was fun to be around.

“It'd be weird if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a big action star because I was told, but I had never really seen his movies. I felt the importance — like, that's cool — but he didn't frighten me. He was simply playful and I just wanted to play with him when he wasn't busy. He was working hard, but he'd occasionally joke around here and there, and we would dangle from his limbs. He'd flex and we'd be hanging off. He was exceptionally kind. He bought every kid in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was like an iPhone. It was the hottest tech out there, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It eventually broke. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the teacher's whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being positive?

You know, it's interesting, that movie became a phenomenon. It was such a big movie, and it was such an amazing experience, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, the direction of Ivan Reitman, the location shoot, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. For example, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the first-generation Game Boy was brand new. That was the big craze, and I was quite skilled. I was the smallest kid and some of the older kids would ask for my help to pass certain levels on games because I was able to, and I was felt accomplished. So, it's all childhood recollections.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember anything about it? Did you know what you were saying?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word taboo meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it caused the crew to chuckle. I knew it was kind of something I wasn't supposed to do, but I was given special permission in this case because it was funny.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it originated, from what I understand, was they didn't have specific roles. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it wasn't necessarily improv, but they worked on it while filming and, presumably someone in charge came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, let me sleep on it" and took a short while. She deliberated carefully. She said she had doubts, but she thought it would likely become one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and she was right.